Living After a Toxic Relationship: 8 Funny and Honest Drawings
An illustrator shows us what it is like to live and rebuild after a toxic relationship through honest and funny drawings
Getting Out of a Toxic Relationship...
Living after having had a toxic relationship with your partner is not always an easy thing. When your heart has suffered it is sometimes hard to rebuild and start a new love story. Our heart goes into "protection" mode. A French illustrator, Sophie Lambda (@sophielambda), shows us through her funny and honest drawings what life is like after a toxic relationship. She also thought of her Anglo-Saxon readers since she made an English version of each drawing (which you will find in the second slide). She even wrote a comic book about it called "Tant Pis pour l'Amour", which means something like “Too Bad for Love”.
In the following pages you will see what it's like to get out of a toxic relationship...
#1 A Sensitive Heart
When you are in a toxic relationship, your heart suffers. And when we leave this relationship, we keep some after-effects. It can sometimes be very difficult to rebuild oneself after such an ordeal. So when we find a man again, we PROTECT ourselves, we put up barriers so as not to suffer again! This is exactly what is represented in this illustration with a lot of humor and lightness.
After such an experience you activate the "Protection Mode"...
#2 "Protection" Mode On
Meeting someone after a toxic relationship with a manipulator is complicated. Even after a long time, it leaves traces. The "fortress of the heart" is very very well guarded! This drawing shows us how much we protect ourselves after having suffered from an unhealthy relationship.
And the "Protection Mode" remains active even after months and months of relationship...
#3 Even after Months in a Relationship...
Even if after a toxic relationship, you manage to rebuild a stable relationship with another man, you may sometimes still have "survival" reflexes. Letting your guard down becomes a VERY VERY difficult exercise. And difficult to understand for the person in front. And yes, he arrives with his good intentions and his heart on a platter, and instead of saying thank you you reinforce the protective barriers of your heart not to suffer again, even after months of relationship!
After suffering in love you become more and more intransigent!
#4 We Become Intransigent
When we try to rebuild ourselves after a toxic relationship, we are much more demanding. And this is normal! At the slightest deviation, or dubious behavior of the person in front of us, we become suspicious. We become intransigent. Shamelessly short messages at late hours: How are you doing? / What are you doing? or 2-3 "likes" on your vacation photos, or a bogus message to cancel at the last minute,... It doesn't work anymore! We get bored and we quickly move on to something else.
But toxicity also occurs in intimacy ...
#5 Toxicity is Also in Intimacy
"If not you, then foreplay, hand stuff, all that... it's not your thing? "
"At the same time, I didn't have any problem getting in..."
...And yes, toxic intimate relationships also exist and have dramatic consequences on physical and mental health. Sometimes victims of such relationships manage to leave their partner. But the separation is always complicated, can take years, and can leave after-effects. It is therefore important to communicate with your partner on the subject and not to let the situation get worse.
It is important to regain self-confidence after having lived a toxic relationship...
#6 Self-Confidence
After an unhealthy relationship, it is sometimes common to lose confidence! But it is important to remember that you are beautiful. You are beautiful, even with your dark circles, your stretch marks, your cellulite, your hair,... These are normal things! So don't be ashamed and be proud of who you are. And remember, you are like wine, you get better with age!
Even if sometimes the first signs of "maturity" can be scary...
#7 The First Signs of Age
The first wrinkles appear and for you it's a tragedy. You feel disfigured, you no longer recognize yourself in the mirror. And yet there is nothing so serious...
And if only there were only wrinkles...
#8 Stop Dramatizing... It's Not That Serious!
After the wrinkles, the white hair... And there is the drama! You've just taken 10 years in the face. But I assure you, this does not mean that you are too old or that you will die tomorrow. White hair is even becoming a trend!